Why?
Why has been on my mind all day. I had to reflect big time to come up with a cumulative answer.
I'm writing this late at night (at least for a teacher) so please excuse the meandering and typos.
Let's go back in time...4th grade. Due to genetics, I shot up like a bean sprout and was the tallest person in the class. Not the tallest girl, the tallest person. Height has always given me an unfair way to hide weight. Upon weighing, the healthcare remark was usually: "your weight is fine for your height". Puberty rolled into the teens. The teens were filled with plenty of unhealthy, carb laden food. Alexina (hope you don't mind the shout-out) and I certainly didn't miss the 5pm dinner bell at the Columbia College cafeteria. And, being small town girls- the megalopolis of Columbia offered all kinds of culinary delights. One of our favorite places was a restaurant called Sub-Cabin which specialized in wings and the best Philadelphia Cheese (emphasis on the cheese) sandwiches. The restaurant has since been bulldozed and that's not a bad thing.
I digress. In college, Alexina introduced me to the love of my life who happen to be from Hampton. The rest is history. My 20's were carefree in the eating/exercise department. In my late 20's I delivered two boys at the end of the century-- 1997 and 1999. Taking care of two babies 16 months apart left little time to eat. The baby weight fell off. I weighed 140 when I got pregnant with my oldest son. As fast as a cheetah can run, my boys grew up and I packed on 80 pounds. I can use all the excuses- "I was depressed" "I was busy with my kids activities", etc, etc, etc...
I was tired of being tired. When the group first started, a few talked to me about it. I was scared to FAIL. Name a diet- and I can almost guarantee you that I've tried it.
This is more appealing because I like the accountability and putting the good, bad and ugly out there. Round 2 rolled around and I didn't think I could do it. It sounded hard and I wasn't sure if I had the discipline to do it. A couple of members kept after me and I'm so thankful.
The kicker ( this is my "why") for me was when my husband came home after a doctor's visit. Mark put the paper on the table and asked me to look at it to see his vital signs (I'm also a nurse). WHAT? I mean HUH? I now weigh more than my husband. Damn. This wasn't the case even when I was pregnant. I didn't tell him- but if he reads this blog post- he will know! Something had to be done. I knew I was spiraling out of control and that was the wake up call I needed. When it was time to do introductory measurements-- my thigh is bigger than my son, Risden's waist. The craziness had to stop.
Why?- I've got to regain control of my health. There are no more excuses, I've used them. I'm at a point in my life where I am mentally and physically ready to take this a lifestyle change.
Myrriah- I will be forever grateful to you for not giving up on me. And, to the other members, your posts help me more than you will ever know.
P.S. This post also helped me use my blog again. I used to write all the time.. Excuse after excuse!
